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Traci

Old Love

Before I let you go, I was hoping I could say

Somethin’ with my eyes so you would know I feel a way

They watch you all the time, they never seem to stray

Follow you out the door, beggin’ you to feel the same


Single life is beautifully freeing. You can be who you are. There is no daily judgement, you can do what you want, when you want. You can cook if you want to, or you can eat out every night. You get to go to see live music, flirt with anyone, and enjoy friends or dates 7 days a week if you so desire.


The reality is, as much as single life is fun, a partner is my end goal. The downside is it can get tiresome looking for the right person to love. There are many obstacles, many more than when I was younger. They are married, separated, bitter, players, cheap, or too showy. We all have baggage later in life and it takes a lot to unpack it and then accept what you find.


Sometimes, that feeling of love can come out of somewhere unexpected and has made me question everything I thought I knew. Love can still make me wistful and feel regret. The beauty of single life is that my choices don’t ever hurt the ones I love. Have I made all the right decisions for them? I often wonder. I have tried, but how will I ever really know. I have given up a lot in the name of love.


Love also makes you feel alive, special, exuberant. Love makes your heart sing. That is the beauty of attraction and caring. I think the longer I date, the more compassion I have for other people’s choices. It has certainly been a rollercoaster ride over the last few years. I am trying to slow down and look at the space I am in and accept the space people are in. I have heard many different perspectives on love over the last few years, not always in alignment with how I feel. I am learning to give grace as I remind myself, I have not walked in their shoes. I have made my own mistakes and I pray that I too may have the grace of God’s forgiveness.

Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. 1Peter 3:8



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